Gossip Girl: Na zdrowie!

It appears Dan Humphrey is the new Nate Archibald, because now that Nate has a storyline of questionable interest, Dan is relegated to looking pretty playing touch football. Seriously, last week Dan was banging his teacher in a closet and this week he was gallivanting around the Vanderbilt estate. Oh, Gossip Girl, land of no consequences.

But at least Nate, who basically ceased to exist as a character for the first part of this season has returned with a stake in the show's action. And what's his stake? A tour of what lies behind the Iron Curtain with his lady love! [Seeing as its not 1989 anymore, I know I should have written that sentence in the past tense, but oh well.]

But Vanessa gave several shout outs to Warsaw! And Dorota finally broke out her Polish! And there were pierogi! Oh, glorious pierogi!

Gossip Girl + shouts out to the land my ancestors = something I never thought would occur. [But no shout outs to the other half of my ancestors in Slovakia? For shame!] Nevertheless, I have a few qualms to pick with you my dear GG writers.

Jeden: Vanessa tells Dan that she and Nate will be traveling around Eastern Europe on a Eurail pass, but when I spent half the money in my bank account on one of those a few years ago, I was saddened to learn I could not travel to land of my ancestors on it. Maybe times have changed! Maybe there is a special Eastern Europe Eurail that includes Warsaw! Maybe someone should have gone to the Eurail website! Because oh yes, according to the website, Poland is not included, even in the Global Pass!

and

Dwa: Nate says to Vanessa "we are eating pierogis." This is incorrect! The "i" ending in Polish denotes the plural, there is no "s" like in English! For instance, even though everyone says this, on Paczki Day do not order a dozen paczkis. No! Redundant! That is already plural! Just order a dozen paczki! I would advise you to learn some of the language when you go abroad Nate, but seeing as I rolled into France with only the ability to say "un" and point at the croissant I wanted, I can't judge you. Also, I should just be happy that pierogi were mentioned at all on Gossip Girl and ignore any minor offenses. But come on, like two seconds earlier Zuzanna Szadkowski delivered a rant in Polish, couldn't she have proofread this script?:



And finally, seeing as I should probably end this GG recap since it has spiraled wildly out of control into a rant about pierogi and paczki, here is a picture of Nate:




















And here is what I envision Nate wearing when he ventures into The Land Of My Ancestors:

















Only someone who was a member of a Polish dance group for 19 years would imagine Nate Archibald dressed as a Lajkonik. Which means this post really, truly, needs to end.

Do widzenia!